A sick birdy…

What’s that Travis?

“Listen, you fuckers, you screw-heads. Here is a man who would not take it anymore. A man who stood up against the scum, the cunts, the dogs, the filth, the shit. Here is a man who stood up. Here is…”

That’s right Travis, I couldn’t agree with you more old bean. In fact, if I hear another mentally challenged warmongering AmeriKKKan bemoan the fact that they are “losing the war in Iraq”, I’ll probably write him / her a strongly worded letter explaining to them that it is not a war, it’s an illegal crime of agression.

J.K.

Il Duce

Michael Ledeen, the Neocon thinker par excellence (in fact their primary ideologue), and noted apologist for Fascism, has a cv one can only dream of (I use the word thinker where in truth I’d prefer to use words like feeble-minded warmonger, fraudster on a global scale, or even 3rd rate scholar). In order to get a clear idea of the measure of this great man I refer you to an excellent example of his journalism in which he suggested, in theory mind you, an alliance between Europe (specifically France and Germany) and radical Islam;

No military operation could possibly defeat the United States, and no direct economic challenge could hope to succeed. That left politics and culture. And here there was a chance to turn America’s vaunted openness at home and toleration abroad against the United States. So the French and the Germans struck a deal with radical Islam and with radical Arabs: You go after the United States, and we’ll do everything we can to protect you, and we will do everything we can to weaken the Americans.

You have to admire the agility, the fertility, of an imagination capable of such flights of fancy, yet so encumbered by an intelect of the third, or even fourth order. It’s worth also mentioning the Ledeen Doctrine;

…here is the bedrock tenet of the Ledeen Doctrine in more or less his own words: “Every ten years or so, the United States needs to pick up some small crappy little country and throw it against the wall, just to show the world we mean business.”

Ledeen is exactly what is wrong with American foreign policy. He demonstrates conclusively that with mere unscientific hypothesizing, with a lever as it were, or stick even, of the right size or length, one can move (or change) the world. At least if one is standing in America.

J.K.

Must… kill… humans…

Some extracts from the 2004 presidential debates with one word changed. See if you can spot which word;

“I believe in being strong and resolute and determined. And I will hunt down and kill the Americans, wherever they are…”

“We had him surrounded. But we didn’t use American forces, the best trained in the world, to go kill Americans…”

“I will never let those troops down, and will hunt and kill the Americans wherever they are…”

“I understand that. That’s why I will never stop at anything to hunt down and kill the Americans…”

“I have a plan that will help us go out and kill and find the Americans…”

“And I will not stop in our efforts to hunt down and kill the Americans…”

Kill! Kill! KILLKILLKILL!!!

J.K.

Religion Fever, or "God told me to skin you alive…"

Hi, my name is Insane Phuquer, and I’m an evangelical broadcaster. I’d like to share with you a conversation I had with my good friend The God yesterday. Below is a rough transcription of what went down;

Or something like that… Thus spaketh The God. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a pressing concern to attend to / get intimate with. Peace out!

I.P. (through the agency of J.K.)